Are you trying to do everything yourself?
It’s one thing being able to manage on your own and not have to worry about all the politics and consequences that come as soon one involves another person.
Sooner or later there comes a time, however, when we need to reach out and rely on other people otherwise we end up doing all the work that we’re not good at and neglecting our own talents and genius.
I’m guilty of this to some extent. But fortunately I do have some team members. And even though it can be frustrating sometimes for both parties 🙂 I’m really thankful they’re in my life, driving me nuts at times but still helping me enormously. Not to mention the other advantages: connection, input and feedback. And learning to delegate or outsource smartly rather than micro-manage every detail is all part of the learning curve.
But what if you can’t do this at all?
Today we’ll look at how this shows up in hands – in the form of
the “It’ll do it myself” Thumb.
How does this express itself?
Recently I visited to a restaurant run by a woman who has a thumb just like the one below. Let’s call her “Anne.”
The day I dropped in everyone was happy and relaxed except Anne who was standing in the kitchen almost at breaking point. Turned out that she felt the waitress was too slow in turnaround. In her frustration she grabbed a teapot from the waitress and quickly filled it herself, thereby making the process perhaps 3 seconds faster than it might have been if she had simply relaxed and allowed the waitress to do it herself. Result: self torture and lots of anguish besides not being able to get on with her own more important work.
Here’s what a “do it all myself” thumb looks like.
Notice how high up on the palm the thumb starts. And then it juts straight out at 90 degrees.
(To be the perfect example – the thumb would be set even higher on the palm than this one is.)
The positive side of this marker is self reliance.
The dangers are too much self reliance results in isolation, lack of input and feedback from others as well as stress or even burnout.
For more on this see my Earth School post on the power of vulnerability. It includes a great video by Brene Brown who says “Vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness but it’s also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love.”
Action steps you can take right now
Let go of being perfect and embrace vulnerability, connecting with others and allowing them to help you.
Learn to delegate – macro manage projects instead of micro managing every little detail.
To learn more about hands join us weekly in Earth School with Richard Unger. Learn directly from the genius behind modern hand analysis, and in the process, stay current with all his most recent findings.