How your hands can help you stay true to your dreams
In some countries there is a very real danger of being hijacked
and having your car stolen. In other countries it’s your biggest
dreams that get taken, right from under your nose.
I’m not sure which is worse. A gun squeezed against your temple
for your car keys, or a dream squeezed out of you at an early
In Switzerland, more than any other country, the risks of having
your car keys taken are virtually nil. I’ve left my keys in the
ignition for years and I can’t seem to tempt anyone. (But then
maybe this is a reflection of my car rather than the country.)
Still, dream hijacking is huge here. And just because you can’t see
the violence, doesn’t mean it isn’t there.
So, how do dreams get hijacked?
Have you ever watched a frigate bird in action?
This is a big black sea bird. Frigates are the pirates of the
They even look like pirates. These birds hover up high waiting
for other seabirds to catch a fish.
As soon as they spot one with a full beak they dive bomb. The
poor gull gets such a fright they drop their dinner and the
frigate scoops up the bounty without missing a wing beat.
Something similar happens in the human world. It’s called shame
and humiliation. Children are most vulnerable to being shamed or
humiliated. So are people who haven’t really examined who they
are and what they stand for. You get bumped and whoops. Next
minute you’re on another track, and your life feels empty.
How does this work?
Something happens to cause you to feel deeply shamed. (You get
dive-bombed) This is an unbearable feeling and often the only
solution is to simply numb out. The more you numb out, the more
you lose touch with your core desires. (You drop your fish, the
one thing that feeds you.) This then causes you to numb out even
more. You’re no longer connected to your feelings. Now anything
can happen. You have no boundaries, maybe even no respect. You
become putty in anyone’s hands, easily molded. This causes even
more numbness and eventually (if you’re lucky) anger or
Why lucky? Well then you know something’s wrong and you can fix
This sounds extreme and it can be, especially in cases of sexual
violation. But what about shaming as a form of social control,
by teachers or over-authoritarian parents? We get trained to
tow the line, conform, be responsible and quit dreaming. So we
put our deepest dreams on hold, often for an entire lifetime.
Sometimes the only way to cope with this violation is to numb
out completely to your heart’s calling. We become numb to our
own feelings and deep passions. Sometimes this numbness is so
deep and has lasted so long we don’t even know it exists!
So, what can we do?
We can find out who we really are and what we really want. A
very good way to do this is through hand analysis.
Also, ask yourself: who really is steering my life?
If you don’t choose what you want to do with every minute of
your life, someone else will do this for you.
Look back at your last week, last month, last year.
To what extent did you do what you really wanted or was it
someone else’s idea?
Sometimes we think we are steering but actually we aren’t.
We are creatures of habit and habitual thinking. Most of our
habits come from our parents or early teachers.
“You are the product of someone else’s
habitual way of thinking.”
To what extent are you conscious of the habits and belief
systems controlling your life? To what extent are you making
decisions based on faulty thinking inherited from your family:
generational fear, ignorance, stories told over and over?
We can’t change what we are not aware of.
The good news?
You can change any habit or belief you like. It takes only 21
days of willpower and then the new habit/belief becomes
automatic and runs on autopilot.
The problem is, we often don’t know what faulty thinking is
running our lives. If you don’t know what to change, you can’t
Questions I ask myself: what are the secondary benefits to
staying blocked? What am I currently getting out of not moving
To what extent are you aware of the choices you make and your
And to what extent are you in touch with your deepest heart’s
desire: Your soul’s calling?
Are you being blocked from living your passions by faulty family
thinking? Or are you being blocked by shame?
The more you explore what’s really blocking you, and what you
value, the freer you become to live the life of your dreams.
The way I see it, here are 4 steps:
1. Explore who you are (hand analysis)
2. Explore what you really want. Are your wants really your wants?
3. Explore what you stand for (your values)
4. Exploret what’s blocking you. (hands can really help here)
Why know your values? Because if you know what you stand for you
can’t get bumped/humiliated.
Also, if your wants clash with your values then they are probably
not your wants but someone else’s.
Here’s a small example from my life. The other day I went to
visit a friend and I took a video with me of my son ‘practicing’
his violin. I thought the video was rather funny but my friend
was horrified. There he was, strumming this delicate precious
instrument singing, ‘I’ve got a little guitar, oh yeah!’
Actually she was more than horrified. It was painful for her to
even look at the video and she chastised me for allowing it.
If I didn’t have a clear idea of what my values are, that I
value creative expression over material object, I may have felt
deeply shamed and would have started tightening up on Jules in
ways that don’t align with my heart.
But let’s push this to the extreme. What if he stomps on his
violin and sets fire to it like Jimmy Hendrix?
I’ll probably have to teach him about severe consequences.
He can do that when he’s a has virtuoso and bought the thing himself.
Yes, Jules does have to learn to respect and care for his
instrument and, as his mother, this is my responsibility to
teach. But I believe he also has to be free to experiment.
Where to draw the line? There are no right and wrong answers
here. It is just a question of values and why you need to be
completely clear about what you personally treasure most.
What do you value most in life? Freedom or security? Beauty or
creative expression? Family or independence? Pure air or owing a
car? Once you know what you stand for you cannot be shifted off
course by other people. You cannot be shamed. You will be less
likely to drop your fish when a frigate dive-bombs you. You’re
prepared. You’ve thought about the subject and made a conscious,
rather than unconscious choice.
Back to blocked passions and finding out what yours are. There’s
Hand analysis for showing you where you are blocked.
The next step is to leapfrog over faulty family thinking.
How do blocked passions show up in hands?
This issue can show up in the fingerprints or in the lines.
If it shows up in the fingerprints, this is a major issue in
How does it show up in fingerprints? The lowest ranked
fingerprint is on left index finger.
And in Lines? Look for a combination of these:
An attack line to the Pluto area (anger from
thwarted ambitions) or career line
An attack line to Saturn (a depression indicator)
An index finger that bends away from the thumb (a power giveaway
A heart line that has fork down into the Mars area (can’t say
A co-dependency line (not in own movie)
A career line that starts inside the lifeline (parent’s chose
Bubbles, Grills, diamonds or boxes under the middle finger or on
the headline (indecision etc related to career)
A bubble on the bottom of the lifeline (a burden of family
These just some of many examples.
If you would like to learn more about these indicators and how
they can help you to better understand yourself and others,
join me for in depth classes.
If you are not interested in learning hand analysis, then I
suggest having your hands analysed to figure out who you are/your
hidden potential/what’s blocking you:
click here to book a session
Happy reclaiming your life!